Gundy paves the way for Mestemaker royalty on the Heisman Couch
Can the Cowboys make the CFP? Herbstreit and Coach Kilmer say they could go all the way. Drew would like everyone to stop asking permission.
STILLWATER, OK — Mike Gundy arrived at The Heisman Couch expecting to conduct an exclusive one-on-one interview with Drew Mestemaker. Within six minutes, he was holding a royal proclamation, standing behind a velvet rope and being corrected on how deeply to bow.
The Oklahoma State quarterback greeted his interviewer from an orange couch beneath a crown, surrounded by four Heisman trophies labeled 2026 through 2029. Production staff said they had originally ordered one trophy as a prop. Drew sent the invoice back marked INCOMPLETE.
“I wanted to talk about his journey,” Gundy said. “Apparently we’re doing his reign.”
Gundy rolls out the royal carpet
GUNDY: You’ve got the whole setup here. The crown, the robe, four trophies. Where does that confidence come from?
MESTEMAKER: Film study. Mostly of me. Sometimes I pause it and just take a minute.
GUNDY: A lot of great players have sat down for interviews like this.
MESTEMAKER: Sure. This is probably the first time the couch has understood the assignment.
Gundy attempted to steer the conversation toward preparation, leadership and the work required to become an elite quarterback. Mestemaker agreed that all three were important, then asked whether the lighting was adequately capturing “the burden of being inevitable.”
A producer quietly changed the show’s running order from Opening Question / Career Discussion / Closing Thoughts to Arrival / Coronation / Tribute.
GUNDY: Four straight Heismans. Even when you’re playing in the NFL?
MESTEMAKER: I understand it’s a college award. That sounds like a problem for the college. I’ll keep my student email active. You don’t keep sending a man parking notices and then pretend you don’t know him in December.
GUNDY: And the other candidates?
MESTEMAKER: They’re a huge part of this. Somebody has to stand up when they say my name.
Can the Cowboys make the CFP? Herbstreit and Kilmer say they could go all the way
The broadcast brought in Kirk Herbstreit to discuss Oklahoma State’s playoff ceiling. He was immediately asked to remove the word ceiling because it implied there was something above Mestemaker.
“The Cowboys could go all the way,” Herbstreit said. “You look at the quarterback, the confidence, the belief in that room. Then you notice the room has a throne in it. That’s a level of buy-in you can’t coach.”
Herbstreit added that every contender eventually has to handle adversity. Mestemaker nodded, recalling the afternoon his crown arrived in the wrong shade of gold.
Coach Kilmer, the fictional high-school tyrant from Varsity Blues, then appeared on the studio monitor despite no one in production remembering booking him.
“They can win the whole damn thing,” Kilmer announced. “I’ve evaluated the arm, the attitude and the square footage available for a championship portrait. All three are there.”
Asked for his tactical assessment, Kilmer said he would give Drew the ball, tell everybody else to do their jobs and replace the suggestion box with another portrait.
Herbstreit tried to discuss matchups. Kilmer demanded a larger wall.
The playoff will need an appointment
GUNDY: So, Drew. Can the Cowboys make the playoff?
MESTEMAKER: Can the playoff make my schedule? We’ve got games, the Heisman ceremony, three future Heisman ceremonies and apparently a parade Gundy is organizing.
GUNDY: I didn’t say I was organizing a parade.
MESTEMAKER: Mike, you’re holding a proclamation. We’ve moved past the exploratory phase.
Gundy looked down at the scroll, which designated him Founding Chairman of the Royal Mestemaker Welcoming Committee. His responsibilities included clearing the route, checking the float’s weight limit and reminding Jeremiah Smith to return the moving blankets.
“I came here with twelve questions,” Gundy said. “I’m leaving with a municipal permit application.”
At press time, the interview had been extended after Mestemaker requested another hour to discuss what he admires most about himself. Gundy asked whether they could take a commercial break. Drew said a brief tribute would be fine.
Campaign update: Mestemaker calls dibs on four straight Heismans →
