Tiafoe jumps for joy as locker stocked with every Skittle ever made

Frances Tiafoe reportedly achieved a new personal best in vertical leap after opening his locker to discover every Skittle ever made, according to an account from a locker room now classified as a confectionery warehouse.

Witnesses said the tennis star remained airborne long enough for tournament officials to consider a rain delay.

“I thought I had seen the whole rainbow,” Tiafoe said, staring into shelves of original, sour, tropical, wild berry and varieties apparently recovered from discontinued airport vending machines. “Turns out I was playing qualifying.”

The collection allegedly includes international editions, retired flavors and one unmarked bag that arrived in a climate-controlled case accompanied by two men who refused to identify their employer.

Tiafoe immediately called his team together for what his coach assumed would be a tactical meeting.

“He had the bags arranged like a tournament draw,” the coach said. “Original got a bye. Sour was seeded second. He said Wild Berry was dangerous indoors.”

The celebration briefly spilled into the corridor after Tiafoe discovered a second shelf behind his spare rackets. Security responded to reports of a grown man shouting “EVERY SINGLE ONE” and determined there was no emergency beyond rapidly diminishing storage capacity.

His team’s nutritionist arrived, looked inside the locker and quietly asked whether the position came with dental coverage.

Tournament organizers denied granting preferential treatment, noting that other players had received the standard allocation of towels, bottled water and a banana with uncertain structural integrity.

Asked whether the discovery would affect his preparation, Tiafoe said he had never been more focused.

“I know exactly what I am doing between sets.”

At press time, the locker could no longer close. Tiafoe had requested a second locker for his tennis equipment.